Have you ever felt kinda empty? Maybe that's not the correct way to describe what's going on... but I'm just feeling blah. Like my heart is troubled or something. Kinda like when your feelings get hurt. But I don't think anyone hurt them. A mystery brain cloud. Out of sorts.
I've felt this way since last night and I'm not really sure what started it. Maybe I'm depressed. Maybe I'm not as happy as I usually think I am. I can take stock of what I have... great family, a home, food, blah blah blah. It doesn't matter. I just feel like I'm missing something.
It's not just mentally. Physically I'm BLAH too. Ngaio hasn't slept well all week, which in turn means Mark and I haven't slept well. I feel tired and achy and BLAH. I want to cry. I want to run around laughing. I want to clean my house completely out.
Is it the looming 31? No, I made my peace with aging. Somewhat, until I read Twilight and wanted to be a teenager again. But that's passing...
I keep coming back to this though-
Yesterday, on Ravelry (a knitting mecca I frequent), there seemed to be more complaining than usual. And NONE of it was about knitting. I got caught up in the drama of it all. Been tending to ignore and stay away from all drama for awhile now, but it all came crashing down yesterday and my feathers got ruffled. Don't get me wrong, I love a good debate. Especially because I'm always right! ;) It just seemed that people were throwing out very personal barbs to each other. Maybe I took something personally somewhere amid all the snarkiness. Anyway, I'm getting to a point...
STOP COMPLAINING. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT OR SHUT UP.
I feel better.
Seriously. If you feel wronged, do something. Write your congressman, call your senator, volunteer, join an advocacy group.
Give money to a charity, take your kids out for ice cream and really let them talk about things. Listen and stop being such a negative CYNICAL adult.
laugh. let someone else go before you in line. smile at a stranger. say please and thank you. leave a big tip. pick up litter.
We all want to make the world better and rarely do we take steps to make it so.
I feel even better...
Get the bad out by doing good. Even if you can't help the situation in Iran or North Korea, you CAN donate some cans of food to a food bank. Or drop off all those hotel tolietries to a women's shelter. Or clean out your bookshelf and leave them at the library.
BE THE CHANGE!
I have things to do now and so should you!
love you all.